Do You Overthink Things?
Do you ever feel like your mind just won’t switch off? It keeps going round and round and especially when you’re feeling anxious about something.
You replay conversations, imagine imagine worst-case scenarios.
You go over decisions again and again.
And the more you think… the worse you feel.
If this sounds familiar, you’re definitely not alone. Overthinking happens to us all. It’s a pattern our minds learned for trying to keep us safe.
The good news? You can gently teach your mind a new way.
Why We Overthink in the First Place
Overthinking is usually your brain’s attempt to keep you ‘safe’ and to do this it feels the need to help you:
Avoid making a mistake
Prevent rejection or failure
Stay in control
Prepare for “what if” scenarios
We are all ‘wired’ this way. Your mind’s number one job is survival!
Your mind believes: “If I think about this enough, I can stop something bad from happening.”
But often your mind is linking current or future situations to past outdated ones or even fears that are no longer relevant for your life today.
And instead of solving the problem, overthinking often creates anxiety, self-doubt and emotional exhaustion.
It pulls you out of the present moment and into an imagined future that may never happen.
The Overthinking Loop
Here’s how it usually works:
Thought → Feeling → More Thoughts → Stronger Feelings → Even More Thoughts
Example:“What if I said the wrong thing?”Leads to embarrassment → replaying the conversation → “They probably think I’m stupid” → more anxiety.
And round and round you go.
To stop overthinking, we don’t try to force the thoughts away. We gently interrupt the loop.
A Simple Tool: Accurate Thinking
One of the most powerful ways to interrupt overthinking is something I call accurate thinking.
It’s not about pretending everything is fine or forcing positive thoughts. It’s about helping your mind come back to what is actually true right now.
Here’s how to do it:
Step 1: Notice the Thought Loop
Simply become aware: “I’m stuck in overthinking.”
This small moment of awareness already begins to shift you out of autopilot.
Step 2: Pause
Don’t argue with the thoughts. Just pause.
Step 3: Take 3 Slow, Deep Breaths
In through your nose… out through your mouth.Long, slow exhales are especially calming.
This is where the science kicks in.
Even 1-2 minutes of deep breathing helps settle the nervous system, reducing activity in the sympathetic nervous system (your fight-or-flight response) and activating the parasympathetic nervous system (your rest-and-digest, calm state).
Usually, when one is activated, the other is dialled down. So as your body begins to calm, your mind can too.
Step 4: Ask Yourself One Question
“Am I safe right now?”
Not “Will I be okay next week?” Not “What if this goes wrong?”
Just: Right now. In this moment. Am I safe?
Most of the time, the honest answer is: Yes. I am safe.
What’s Happening in Your Brain
When you’re overthinking and anxious, the amygdala — the part of the brain that detects threat — is highly active. It’s scanning for danger and triggering emotional and fight-or-flight responses, even if the “danger” is just a thought about the future.
At the same time, the more logical, rational part of your brain — the prefrontal cortex — becomes less active. That’s the part responsible for reasoning, perspective and calming reassurance.
When you pause, breathe deeply and ask “Am I safe right now?” you help calm the nervous system. This reduces amygdala activity and allows the prefrontal cortex to come back online.
In simple terms: You move from survival mode… back into thinking mode.
Calm the Body First, Then the Mind Follows
This is why trying to “think your way out” of overthinking often doesn’t work. If your nervous system still feels under threat, your brain will keep producing anxious thoughts.
This is what we call a ‘bottom-up’ method (using the body to calm the mind) rather than a ‘top-down’ which is using thinking to calm the system.
This ‘bottom-up’ way works like this: Calm the body → signal safety → activate the parasympathetic nervous system → reduce fight-or-flight → bring the rational brain back into action.
Then your thoughts naturally become clearer and less dramatic.
Speak to Yourself Like Someone You Care About
And another step to add to this accurate thinking technique is to watch how you talk to yourself (the thoughts you think) and to shift this to something more helpful. Once you’re calmer, notice your inner voice.
Overthinkers are often incredibly hard on themselves:
“Why are you like this?”
“You always mess things up.”
Try shifting to:
“It’s okay to feel anxious.”
“I’m safe right now.”
“I can handle this step by step.”
Self-compassion further reduces the brain’s threat response and supports emotional regulation.
And You Don’t Have to Believe Every Thought You Think….
When you notice your thoughts and take a pause you can imagine them as separate to you. Imagine looking at them from a separate space, a bit like looking at a tree in the park. The tree is a separate entity.
This is a helpful way to view your thoughts too.
Because a thought or fear is not a fact. Just as an anxious mind is not always a truthful one.
Overthinking is a habit your mind learned — and accurate thinking is a gentle way to teach it something new.
Each time you notice the loop, pause, breathe and ask: “Am I safe right now?” you are rewiring your response from fear… to calm, from panic… to a more balanced (and often more real) perspective.
And that’s where real change begins.
Have you ever sat in a meeting, on a client call, or preparing for a pitch, and thought…
“Who am I to be doing this?” “What if they find out I’m not as capable as they think I am?” “Maybe I just got lucky my previous success…”
If any of those sound familiar, you’re not alone.
This is most probably some form of impostor syndrome—and it’s one of the most common (and quietest) forms of self-sabotage among women in work and business.
What Is Impostor Syndrome?
Impostor Syndrome is that internal experience of feeling like a fraud, even when there’s plenty of evidence that you’re competent, skilled, and deserving of your success.
It tends to be the disconnect between what others see and what you feel inside.
If you struggle with this you might:
Downplay your achievements
Procrastinate or overwork to “prove yourself”
Avoid opportunities that stretch you
Fear being “found out”
Struggle to celebrate wins or receive compliments
Suffer with a lack of self-belief at times
And it’s not just an inner dialogue—it impacts how we act in our work and conduct our businesses:
The worst bit for me is that impostor syndrome can take away the enjoyment and excitement of striving to achieve your goals and dreams. This process should be fun as well as hard work!
Why Do So Many Women Experience It?
Impostor Syndrome does also affect men but it’s been found to be more common in women.
Societal conditioning plays a huge role. From a young age, many women are taught to be humble, not to brag, to be likeable and accommodating. So when we finally start taking up space, charging what we're worth, or leading in our field—it can trigger all kinds of inner resistance.
If you’ve come from a background where perfectionism, people-pleasing, or needing to earn your worth were ingrained, impostor syndrome can show up as your nervous system trying to "protect" you from rejection or failure.
When we’re experiencing these internal battles it’s important to remember the truth:
We’re not impostors, we’re human beings, doing our best!
Feeling uncomfortable doesn’t mean you’re a fraud. It means you’re growing. It means you're stepping into the next version of yourself. And that voice of doubt? It’s just an outdated belief system running in the background.
The good news? You can change it.
Not by pushing harder or “faking it till you make it,” but by realigning your inner beliefs with your outer success.
Here are 3 Practical Tips to Overcome Impostor Syndrome
1. Reframe Your Inner Dialogue:
Start paying attention to the critical voice in your head. When it says, “You’re not good enough” or “You don’t belong here,” pause and ask: “Is this fact or fear?” Then consciously reframe it with a more grounded truth, like:🗣 “I’ve earned my place here.”🗣 “I’m allowed to be learning and still be a leader." The more you challenge the inner critic, the quieter it becomes.
2. Keep a “You Did That!” File:
Create a folder (digital or physical) where you save testimonials, kind words, achievements, milestones, screenshots of wins—anything that reminds you of how capable and impactful you are. On the days Impostor Syndrome kicks in, read through it. Let it ground you back into your truth. Tell yourself: “You’ve done hard things before—you can do this too.”
3. Do the Inner Work, Not Just the Outer Strategy:
Impostor Syndrome can often come from subconscious beliefs formed earlier in life (like “I have to be perfect to be accepted” or “I’m not smart enough”). You can try to act despite it and attempt to “push through”… but real freedom comes from healing it at the root. Therapies like RTT (Rapid Transformational Therapy), hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique/Tapping and mindset coaching can help you rewrite those old narratives for good—so you stop feeling like a fraud and start owning your worth.
Success Starts from Within
This is exactly what I help women do in my work. You will experience a deep, transformational process that helps you:
✔ Rewire subconscious beliefs like “I’m not good enough”
✔ Release patterns of perfectionism and self-doubt
✔ Step into your next level with calm confidence
✔ Align your mindset with the success you already deserve
If you know deep down you're ready to stop second-guessing yourself and start owning your brilliance, book a discovery call here!
And just remember:
You don’t need to be more to feel worthy.
You already are.
Now it’s time to believe it—and lead from that place.
Putting it off until 'tomorrow'?
We’ve all done it. Avoided doing the thing! That task you know you need to start – and somehow, it's suddenly the perfect time to reorganize your kitchen cupboards, scroll endlessly on social media, sort out your shoes or binge-watch a series you’ve already seen.
Once you’ve avoided the task you really need to do, shame or guilt can set in and these emotions can make you feel worse and not empowered at all. This means you’re even less likely to get down to the things you really need to do.
And the cycle continues..
This pattern can be so frustrating and painful at the same time, believe me I’ve lived it and as a human, still feel it at times. But when you begin to understand what procrastination really is and what’s causing it you can actually begin to change it!
Because procrastination isn't just about poor time management and its definitely not laziness. In many cases, it runs deeper – and your subconscious mind is often behind it.
In this blog I will explain what I’ve come to learn about procrastination and the subconscious, in an attempt to help you if you identify with this.
So, what’s the subconscious got to do with it?
Your subconscious mind is like a silent operating system running beneath the surface. It's where your long-held beliefs, memories, emotional patterns, and fears live.
And its main job is to protect you – even if that means holding you back from doing the things you consciously want. The subconscious is all about safety and survival, rather than success!
So when you procrastinate, it’s not always a motivation issue. It’s much more likely a protective mechanism kicking in.
Let’s look at how this works:
1. Fear of Failure (or Even Fear of Success)
If your subconscious associates taking action with the risk of failing – or with stepping into the unknown – it may slam the brakes on. This part of your mind loves familiarity. Why? Because what you’ve already experienced and lived through, it deems as safe. This is why our habits become hard-wired and automatic.
So, anything new and different will require more effort from your mind and it will try to stop you and keep you exactly where you are, as this way it can effortlessly do its job!
It will feed you thoughts to keep you in the safety/comfort zone.
Thoughts like:
“What if I mess this up?”
“What if people judge me?”
“What if I actually succeed and everything changes?”
And these thoughts can be linked to deeply rooted fears that trigger the ‘freeze response’. So you stall, delay, distract – and call it procrastination.
But what’s happening here is, your mind is sabotaging you making change, because it’s number one job is survival and doing nothing is the easiest and simplest way to ensure you stay safe.
Make sense?
Try This:
Ask yourself: What am I really afraid will happen if I succeed at this? Or if I fail?
Awareness is the first step to releasing these fear-based patterns.
2. Perfectionism (a Sneaky Form of Self-Protection)
Perfectionism often stems from a subconscious belief that you’re “not good enough” as you are. So you avoid starting or finishing things unless you’re sure they’ll be perfect. That all-or-nothing thinking leads to paralysis.
Your subconscious might believe:💭 “If it’s not perfect, it’s not safe to put it out there.”💭 “If I don’t try, I won’t risk failing.”
So you wait. And wait. And wait…
Try This:
Remind yourself: Progress over perfection. Done is better than perfect. Taking imperfect action rewires your subconscious to feel safe with growth and momentum.
3. Old Identity Programming
If you’ve always seen yourself as someone who “just isn’t very productive” or “tends to procrastinate,” your subconscious is likely reinforcing that identity.
It’s not that you're lazy – it's that your brain is loyal to the beliefs you’ve repeated over time.
The more you say “I always leave things to the last minute,” the more your subconscious makes that true.
Your subconscious always adheres to the words you tell it about yourself and the world.
Try This:
Start shifting your language:Instead of “I’m such a procrastinator,” try “I’m learning to take aligned, consistent action.”
Repetition matters – your subconscious listens to the words you speak, and it learns by repetition. So write some helpful empowering statements and put them around your home and work space so that you read them often!
4. Emotional Overload or Avoidance
Sometimes the task itself triggers uncomfortable feelings – like anxiety, shame, or self-doubt. Your subconscious wants to avoid that discomfort, so it pushes you toward distraction instead.
This might look like:
Avoiding starting your business because it feels overwhelming
Delaying sending a pitch because it brings up fear of rejection
Putting off studying because it reminds you of feeling “not smart enough” in school
Try This:
Notice the emotion that comes up when you think about the task. Instead of avoiding it, name it. Sit with it. When you stop resisting the emotion, it loses power – and action becomes easier. I like to explain emotions as vibrations that move through the body.
Often if you name an emotion and take a couple of deep breaths allowing the emotion to be felt it passes in 60-90 seconds! The willingness and ability to do this and not push uncomfortable emotions away will give you inner strength and teach your mind that you are able to deal with discomfort and still take the action you need to take. This is so powerful!
Here are some of my best tips for overcoming procrastination by using your subconscious mind to empower you and not hold you back:
Get Curious, Not Critical – Shame feeds procrastination. Compassion dissolves it.
Rewrite the Beliefs – Use journaling, affirmations, or techniques like hypnotherapy or PSYCH-K to rewire the beliefs holding you back.
Visualize the Outcome – Your subconscious loves images and emotion. Picture yourself confidently completing the task and feeling proud.
Take Tiny Steps – Even the smallest action signals to your subconscious: It’s safe to move forward.
Remember procrastination isn’t about being lazy – it’s often a subconscious safety strategy.
Once you understand what your mind is trying to protect you from, you can begin to gently reprogram those patterns.
The truth is: procrastination doesn't mean you are flawed! You’re just running an outdated script. It’s just old programming!
And the beautiful thing? Scripts and programs can be rewritten.
If you’re ready to stop letting old beliefs drive your behavior and finally take aligned action toward your goals, take a look at my Success Alignment Method. This program gives you effective tools to rewire the subconscious for more success with ease!
Your subconscious isn’t your enemy – it just needs new instructions.
Want help identifying and releasing the beliefs that fuel your procrastination?
Let’s work together to rewire your subconscious and make success feel safe, possible, and even exciting. 💫
Book a discovery call here!
